This from Billings, Montana

Julie,

You know... you guys really just don't get it. Being gay is not even the same as being a drug addict. You are also assuming that Jesus, even though he did mention homosexuality EVEN ONCE, has a problem with me.

Here's what I know of Christians:
- the biggest hypocrits in the book. You love to point fingers at how everyone else is living without looking at how you live (that's called judging others, by the way).
- have nothing else better to do than attend some poor boys funeral with picket signs no less, to protest that he was gay. You know, come to think of it, I do think that Jesus would have something to say about that.
- have nothing else better to do than to try to convince people that homosexuality is the worst of all "diseases". Homosexuality has never been a problem of mine. Homophobia, bigotry, and hate have been my problems.

I've been put in the hospital by two Christian boys who beat the hell out of me on a Thursday night, but managed to make it to church the following Sunday morning. Me, I was fighting for my life in the hospital for the next three weeks.

You people don't understand me at all. And that is sad, because you never see who I am. You never will because you can't see beyond yourselves.

I agree with Tasha. It seems though that many of us who disagree with the lifestyle get branded as homophobic and hateful. I can tell you that I had a dark past, not with homosexuality but with drugs and alcohol and Jesus showed me the way out. I have several friends that have come out of the lifestyle, and that is what we are about. I get sad that we cannot say anything without someone putting a hard edge to it. Maybe you won't agree but we truly want god's best for your lives. Julie

"To me, that's not a reality show about gay people. A really good reality show for gay people would be five gay men dying of AIDS." - Julie Millam

Julie, while I understand that words can be taken out of context, it's hard for me to understand that you could have said anything else to alter the meaning of the two sentences above. Presented in any order, both sentences encapsulate a total thought.

The problem I have with your statement is that they you are misinformed. Yes, AIDS did hit the gay community in the United States very hard, as it has in other areas of the world. But here, because it happened to hit the gay community, many used that to say and do horrible things to the gay community. Just exactly where were you and other Christians when we were dying left and right? I'll tell you exactly where you were. You were outside the hospitals and hospices carrying signs that read "death to sodomites", and "Thank God for AIDS", and the ever popular "AIDS kills fags DEAD!". The people carrying these signs claimed to be Christians.

Is that the kind of Christian you want to be? I do believe in God, because when I was down and crying because my friends were dying all around me, He was one that I knew would be there for me. When I saw the signs outside of people picketing the hospital, I thought of something Jesus said, "Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do". Well, I did try to forgive, but it has taken me a lot of years to get over my anger. So when people like you say things like "A really good reality show for gay people would be five gay men dying of AIDS", how do you think I should react? I'd honestly like to know.

Now, if you still feel that I've misrepresented what you said, I would be willing to publish the entire interview with the EXACT transcript of the interview, totally unaltered. That's as fair as I can be.

You and I will never agree on this issue - it just won't happen. I am in a 27 year relationship with my lover. We have been through a lot in our relationship because of people like you. I am still very angry that people like you have nothing else better to do than to get in our face about the relationship that we share.

The reality is this. We are here. I have a respectable job. I am a great person who cares very deeply for my fellow mankind (yes Julie, that even includes you). I believe in God, and He believes in me. I wouldn't hurt a soul and Julie, if you ever needed help, I would be right there to help you, except to help your cause. What you are doing is not only very offensive to people, but is also very hurtful. Choose wisely the words you use when talking about people. They can cut like knives.

Bill

The comments that were published were misrepsentitive of what I said. I never ever would want to see someone die of AIDS -either homosexual or straight. I asked the reporter if I had given her that impression and she said no. people are twisting my words to say something completely different. Blessings to you- Julie

Hi Tasha.

I'm glad you left your comment. I understand that many people can have strong views concerning gay people. The thing that bothers me most of all is when those people cross the line.

One example of crossing the line is picketing at a funeral. For example, when Matthew Shepard's parents and friends went to Matthew's funeral, they had to deal with religious fundamentals with picket signs. These signs had such slogans as "Matthew in HELL", "Thank GOD for AIDS", and "Death to Sodomites". That is crossing the line. A funeral is a sacred service. Above that, where the hell is their sense of decency? It would never occur to me in a thousand years to picket some funeral. These people very honestly scare the hell out of me.

It also stirs something inside of me that I'm very uncomfortable with. It makes me wish harm upon them. I wouldn't loose sleep if I woke up some morning and heard that Fred Phelps died. I would say, "may he rest in Hell". What does that say about me? See, I am a Christian. Those thoughts bother me immensely because I do try to treat others like I would like to be treated and I do try to treat everyone with respect.

I have watched my brothers die one by one - many being held by me when they took their last breath. Where were the "Christians" then? I can't answer that although I can say this, judging from the kind of character of Jesus: upon the return of Jesus, you won't find him gathering with the likes of fundamentalist Christians, in rich churches, or well-off people. You will find him among those dying of AIDS, CANCER, and other illnesses.

I have a deep belief in God and his compassion. This has gotten me through the times in high school where I wanted to give up. It got me through the time when I, as a 15 year old boy, went to the alter after my pastor blasted homosexuals from the pulpit. I asked God to take away my homosexuality. When He didn't, I attempted suicide because I felt that no one loved me, most of all God.

Today, we have the Harvey Milk school for gay teens. I know first hand what these kids are going through. I want to strangle the people who come out against this school because they have no idea what these kids go through, nor do they really care. Their ONLY concern is that the school might be "promoting" homosexuality. It's enough to make me sick. People don't "join" the homosexuals. They aren't "recruited" by the homosexuals. People need to get over it and love one another. Too many kids have opted to give up and kill themselves because they are gay. They saw no way out of the hate that society feels for them. Were they wrong? I have to say, I don't know. Going through life as a gay man is a struggle every day. When I leave home in the morning, I have worries if something bad will happen during the day. I put it in the back of my mind and go about my business. That's all we can do.

But, to tell a young person who is gay that your life will get better... I can't honestly say that it can or will. That is the world that gay people in this country live in. So, my question is... what are the "Christians" going to do about it? The answer is: try to pass an amendment to the Constitution of the United States of America defining marriage as a union between one man and one woman, in order to keep gay people from ever being able to form a lasting relationship that society will be behind and support.

So much for Christianity. Jesus would be proud.

I just "happened" upon your blog.

I have enjoyed reading your perspective on many issues. I also want you to know that not all of us (Christians) are hateful and vingeful.
My husband and I are in full time ministry and do our best to serve God by loving Him and others'.
"Christians", I am sad to say, aren't always the best representitives of Christ. Hopefully you can (or do) know Him yourself and understand that His heart is about seeking the lost for eternal life. It's never his desire to see anyone perish or "burn in Hell."
It breaks my heart when I read about those pastor's and their picket signs. If they truly know Him, they should know better.
You guys are in my prayers! God bless!