May The Force be With you All

I’m sitting here listening to The Marriage of Figaro, by Mozart. I know, most of you don’t know opera. That’s not the point.

I come to this place when I feel overwhelmed by life. Today is the Sunday before Memorial Day. I’m wondering how many people really honor or understand Memorial Day. It’s kind of like Christmas, I suppose. Not everyone celebrates Christmas, which is fine. But many don’t even know what they are not celebrating.

I was going to point out some injustices in the world - where do I begin? But you know, sometimes you just have to overlook everything and realize that, there were injustices before my existence ever came to be. There will be injustices after I’m gone. It’s important to realize that our lives are only a slice in time on this planet. That’s important, because it points out just how fragile and short life is.

People say all the time, “Life’s too short for that...”. But do they really stop and think about what that means? I think it’s become cliché. I remember my sister used to say it all the time - when were were speaking to each other. The last time I talked with here was 1984, on the occasion of my Mother’s funeral.

God... now Maria Callas is singing Ah! Je Ris, from Faust (Gounod). WONDERFUL!

I’m very disconnected to my family. What is family? I know this is going to sound very very lame. But to those of you who have seen the Star Wars movies, indulge me...

There is a scene where Yoda talks about The Force. He talks about how everything is connected - how The Force is everywhere, “...yes, even the ground we walk on.” That is what life is to me. And, one of the things that has been most difficult for me to deal with in life is how we focus on everything that is different about ourselves at the expense of what we have in common. We let that tear us apart.

There is something inside me that wants to shake mankind into knowing that we are all one people. We are all the same, when you get down to the elements of what make us human beings. How much war, hatred, and bigotry must we put ourselves through before we realize that? That is the tragedy of life.

I think when people get to old age, there is a lot that they have come to accept and let go of. One is that people are petty. People care about everything that is unimportant. They put whatever that is important at any given time up on a pedestal (along with themselves) and say, “THIS is what is important!”

The seventy-year-old person will see through that and understand that it means nothing. They are brought back to the elements of their existence - the people they love – their humanity. Their sole and selfless message to all is, care for others. That’s what I want to say.

I enjoy my life. This is actually the best period of my life right now, but when I’m seventy or so years old, if I make it to that age, I think I will be ready to leave. By that time, I suppose no one will care about anyone else. But eventually, I suppose after civilization falls (and I don’t think we are that far off), we will all come back to what is important – humanity. Or, we will perish. It really is just that simple.

All the things we think are so damn important now, will disappear. I’ve put marriage way up at the top of my list because I believe that it is possibly one of the last things that can bring us closer together. It’s important to me. But, is it the real issue? Probably not. I love Kent. That is what is important. The fact that he may not be able to visit me in a hospital because we are “legal strangers” probably shouldn’t be the hot issue to me. But my insecurities win the day all the time it seems. I find myself wondering why people hate so much and are so threatened by Kent and myself - I probably won’t understand that until I am seventy or so.

Hopefully, by then, I will have an answer to share with all of you, if we are still here.