With Neighbors Like This...

This reminded me of our current neighbors. I took a bottle of wine over to them as a welcome gift to our neighborhood when they moved to the house next to us. Instead of a friendly neighbor, I was confronted by someone who pulled his kids in behind him, looked at me like I was a child molester (oh, he took the wine), and said nothing else to me.

This all left me so uncomfortable that I backed away never taking my eyes off of him (he was cutting wood with an ax). Today, we don’t talk. If his home happened to catch fire, I would call the fire department... when I got around to it. But there’s no way in hell I’m going to shovel the bastard’s driveway.

DEAR AMY:
My husband and I have lived in our quiet suburban Denver neighborhood for six years.

About two years ago, two young gay men moved in across the street. They’ve taken the ugliest, most rundown property in the neighborhood and remodeled and transformed it into the pride of the street. When it snows, they shovel out my car and are friendly, yet they mostly keep to themselves.

Last month I went out to retrieve my newspaper and watched them kiss each other goodbye and embrace as they each left for work. I was appalled that they would do something like that in plain view of everyone. I was so disturbed that I spoke to my pastor. He encouraged me to draft a letter, telling them how much we appreciate their help but asking them to refrain from that behavior in our neighborhood. I did so and asked a few of our neighbors to sign it.

Since I delivered it, I’ve not been able to get them to even engage me in conversation. I offer greetings but they’ve chosen to ignore me. They have made it so uncomfortable for the other neighbors and me by not even acknowledging our presence.

How would you suggest we open communications with them and explain to them that we value their contributions to the neighborhood but will not tolerate watching unnatural and disturbing behavior.

Wondering

DEAR WONDERING:
You’re lucky that these gentlemen merely choose to ignore you.

Your neighbors could respond to your hospitality by hosting weekly outdoor “gay pride” barbecues and inviting all of their friends to enjoy life on your quiet suburban street. I can hold out hope that they will choose to do this, but I’m spiteful in that way. Your neighbors sound much more kind.

In your original petition to these men, you basically stated that while you value them when they are raising the standard on your street and shoveling your driveway, you loathe them for being who they are.

The only way to open communication with your neighbors would be to start by apologizing to them for engaging your other neighbors in your campaign. Because you don’t sound likely to apologize, you are just going to have to tolerate being ignored.

Source (some editing was done for display purposes only)