Miscellaneous: November 2005 Archives

Albert Soto, a Tucson actor and community activist who died Saturday, intended to donate his eyes and tissue after death, but both were rejected because he was gay.

The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has established guidelines allowing centers to reject donations from men who have had sex with men within the past five years, said Sara Pace Jones, a spokeswoman with the Donor Network of Arizona. [...]

The decision has outraged Soto’s family members. They are trying to rally the support of local elected officials to have the guidelines changed. (source)

I was considering at one time donating my organs when I die. I used to give blood as often as I could. Then, the American Red Cross stated that the blood of gay men would be refused. In fact, for the rest of my life, I cannot give blood. Now, it appears that the organs of gay men will also be refused.

I hear of people from time to time who are dying of leukemia or some such disease. Even though it is painful, I was willing to donate bone marrow for a stranger - if it could help. It honestly never occurred to me that I would be refused.

I suppose this is one of those things that does not merit my worry. It is beyond my control. But what if I am a tissue match for someone who is dying. What if I could have saved a life?

If the family knew that I could have saved their loved one, do you really think they would care that I am gay? It makes no sense to me, since all blood and all tissue is checked from everyone for defects and disease.

Such a strange world we live in.

This all reminds me of something that happened years ago now. There was a program called “Toys for Tots”. It was a programs where local businesses collected toys for needy children at Christmas. It was sponsored by the Marines. Just before Christmas, the Marines would go by each business, collect the boxes of toys, and distribute them to the children.

This from the archives....

Marines nearly refuse “Gay” Toys For Tots - Los Angeles: The Marines refused to send a few good men to a gay bar to pick up Christmas gifts collected in the Toys for Tots campaign, but a state legislator “did the logical thing” and delivered them to a collection center.

The Marines were asked to pick up the toys for 100 needy children collected at a party in a bar in North Hollywood. Bar owner and former Marine Mark Siefker had made prior arrangements for the pickup, but the Marines decided this week it would be “inappropriate for the Marines to go into a homosexual establishment.”

“I couldn’t believe it,” said state Sen. Alan Robbins, whose district includes the bar. “I’m kind of surprised that the Marines would not pick up the toys here. Who knows, maybe when I run again my slogan will be, ‘Alan Robbins will go where the Marines are afraid to go.’”
Source: THE WEEKLY NEWS, December 28, 1983

A new Vatican document on homosexuality in the Catholic priesthood touched off a storm of criticism on Wednesday from those who say the Church is missing the point and using gays as scapegoats for its sex scandals.

The document, which says the Church can admit those who have clearly overcome homosexual tendencies for at least three years, is due to be released officially next week.

But it said practicing homosexuals and those with “deep-seated” gay tendencies and those who support a gay culture should be barred, a stand which was welcomed by conservatives both in the Catholic Church and in other religions.

“This looks like a diversionary tactic to deflect public attention away from the Vatican’s real problem which is child sex abuse by clergy,” said Peter Tatchell of the British gay pressure group OutRage!

“The Pope should be tackling pedophiles within the Church, not witch-hunting gay people,” he told Reuters.

The document re-enforces standing policy that many in the Church believe has not been properly enforced. Its urgency has been highlighted by the 2002 sexual abuse scandal in the United States, where some 80 percent of the victims were boys. (source)

Where do I begin?

First and foremost, I’m scared for the boys who will continue to be molested. I am more concerned for them because the Catholic Church, the Vatican, and the Pope are doing a great disservice and injustice by completely missing the point on this issue. The central issue is, homosexuality and pedophilia are completely separate and unrelated issues!

But the real question is, does the Vatican really care? After all, they’ve spent decades shifting priests around the world from one church to the next when unsettling issues come up (some child complains about “being touched there” or some parent complains). The answer has always been to move that priest somewhere else and get a new priest.

And it’s always the boys who are being molested. Why? Because being a pedophile is like being a rapist. It is a crime of opportunity and it is a crime against a weaker individual. It is not a crime of passion. If those priests had the same access to girls, they would have been molested as well.

But what does the Vatican conclude? It must be the homosexual priests doing the dirty deed. That’s dangerous and it gives little regard to the children in the church left alone with priests.

I’m not Catholic, so I suppose I have no vested interest in this, other than being a good citizen and standing up to these cases of abuse. The Catholic Church is free to do as it wants. Why any gay man would want to be part of a body who despises them so much is beyond me, but to each his own, I suppose.

But now that the Catholic Church has made it’s decision, we know two things:

1) They have little regard for the safety of the children within their church

2) The abuse will continue, because they have not dealt with the problem. It may go underground for awhile and hide because of the spotlight on this issue at this time, but it will come back.

Who will they blame then, when the homosexual priests are gone? After the gay priests are gone and the Catholic Church pats itself on the back for “dealing with the problem”, I hold the Pope personally responsible for every child who is molested at the hands of a priest.

You should too.

I suppose I’m airing my personal baggage here, but 50 is not old! Don’t get me wrong. I think the idea of having a gay retirement center is awesome, and I REALLY like the idea of “scantily clad go-go boys” running around the room.

I just can’t quite get my head around that one statement... “RainbowVision is your typical ‘after 50’ kind of place... There is a social director, a dining facility and residents who range in age from 50 to 94.”

The problem is, I can’t imagine myself moving to a retirement home (read, nursing home), at the age of 50 and being around people in their 80’s and 90’s. Of course, I suppose that’s insensitive. There are people who are in their 50’s with debilitating illnesses, and for those people, a place like this would be a blessing.

I carry too much baggage I think. The gay oriented nursing home is a good thing because we just haven’t gotten to the point of acceptance yet. Actually, I don’t know if we will ever get to a point of having a gay pride parade at a straight-oriented nursing home. But one thing is for certain - people shouldn’t have to spend their late years worrying about other people who don’t have their crap together when it comes to acceptance and tolerance.

Joy Silver had never seen a nursing home quite like it: There was pulsating music, a spinning disco ball and, yes, even scantily clad go-go boys.

“I said to myself, ‘Yeah, that’s what I want. I want that party when I get to be that age,’” Silver would say many years later when remembering the nursing home in New York’s West Village.

Today, Silver is working to create just that kind of retirement facility--not only for herself but also for hundreds of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered people who eventually will move into a soon-to-open community dubbed RainbowVision on the outskirts of Santa Fe.

In many regards, RainbowVision is your typical “after 50” kind of place. It has a mixture of independent-living units, assisted-living units and state-of-the-art medical care for the extremely aged and infirm. There is a social director, a dining facility and residents who range in age from 50 to 94. And the community has been built in the kind of beautiful setting -- on the edge of the Sangre de Cristo Mountains -- that makes a lifetime of saving for retirement seem well worthwhile. [...]

But the 146-unit facility is also unique. It is marketed specifically to gay retirees and elderly as a place to spend the remainder of their lives among people who will not judge them for their lifestyles or life partners. It not only will have gourmet cooking classes, but also rowdy drag queen shows and gay pride parades. And it is seen less as a place to quietly savor the golden years than a place to boisterously savor the very way of life that many of the residents have spent decades fighting to have society see as acceptable. (source)

We live in a country where a gay teen attempts suicide every 35 minutes. About every six hours, one succeeds. (source)

I worked most of the day at home. I got a lot done up to the time I had to leave for the doctor.

I had a follow-up visit today with a specialist, which was the result of my last physical that my doctor gave me. I’m in good health (I think). On my last physical, my doctor found blood when he did the exam... you know... down there. I hate talking about this stuff, but I think you can figure out what I’m talking about. He put the test in front of me and said, “It turned blue.” I asked what that meant and he said, “Probably nothing, but we have to check it out. It found blood.”

At any rate, he sent me to a Gastroenterology/Internal Medicine guy, and that was what I did today. I didn’t want to go, but my doctor, seeing that I was hesitant to go, said to me, “Listen, you are 50 now. We were going to do this as part of procedure anyway. So let’s just get it done, so we know everything is ok.”

So today, the doctor tested again, and once again, found blood. He went over all the scenarios and that he wanted to do a colonoscopy. He explained that I would be “mostly knocked out”. I said, “I don’t want to be awake for it at all.” He said that would be fine, seeing that I was upset about the whole thing. I don’t like doctors poking around my body. And I really hate hospitals. It seems like I’ve spent half my life at a hospital, mostly taking friends there, visiting friends, or picking them up. I don’t make a good patient.

The nice thing was that when the doctor first saw me, he said, “You are 50 years old?? I said, “I sure am.” He replied, “Wow! You look like you’re 35!” Now that was nice!

So, I’m a bit down/worried about the whole thing. The worst part is that I have to wait until December 12 for it to be done. As much as I don’t want to do it, I would rather it just be over with. You should see all the stuff you have to do the day before. You can have nothing solid at all. It will be done on a Monday morning, so nothing at all Sunday. You can have coffee or tea, but only if you put cream in them (no idea why), no salad stuff at all two days before, and nothing solid. And you have to get this stuff from the drug store that I suppose is some kind of a purging agent. Gross.

Kent leaves tomorrow morning really early (4:30am) for Washington, D.C. again for another meeting. I hate it when he travels and is away. But, that’s what movie collections and HD TV are for, right? He gets back on Friday.

I like to think that I’m pretty well informed about things, but I had no idea that the No Child Left Behind Act requires high schools to provide student data to any military recruiter who asked for that information. Just astonishing, and I think very frightening.

More than 5,000 high school students in five of the state’s largest school districts have removed their names from military recruitment lists, a trend driven by continuing casualties in Iraq and a well-organized peace movement that has urged students to avoid contact with recruiters.

The number of students removing their names has jumped significantly over the past year, especially in school systems with many low-income and minority students, where parents and activists are growing increasingly assertive in challenging military recruiters’ access to young people.

Since 2002, under the federal No Child Left Behind law, high schools have been required to provide lists of students’ names, telephone numbers, and addresses to military recruiters who ask for them, as well as colleges and potential employers. Students who do not wish to be contacted -- or their parents -- notify their school districts in writing. (source)

This is exactly why I have given up on organized religion. I used to go to church often. But when a Presbyterian church in Coventry asked us not to attend because the would not “be comfortable” with a gay couple in their midst, that kind of did it for me. I wasn’t asking to have sex on the alter - simply to attend church.

At any rate, this is more of the same warmed over crap, and the fact that they are simply transferring the guy to another church only shows that they condone his behavior. You know, just like the Catholic Church did with the child molesters and later blamed “homosexual priests” for.

So typical.

A rural Virginia minister placed on leave for denying a gay parishioner membership in his church last winter will be reinstated, a national Methodist judicial body announced Monday. [...]

At a three-day meeting in Houston, the Judicial Council — the Methodist equivalent of the Supreme Court — decided Rev. Edward Johnson was within his ministerial rights when he denied membership to the would-be parishioner in December. (source)

You know, I can understand the Boy Scouts of America wanting to keep gays out of their “private organization”. The truth that gay men may just be able to help out scares the crap out of them. The truth that being a gay man does not equal being a pedophile scares the crap out of them. I can understand that.

I can even understand that the United States Supreme Court ruled in favor of the Boy Scouts of America being able to keep gays out of their organization, ruling that they could do so because they were a “private organization”.

This cuts both ways. If the Boy Scouts can exclude gays from their “private organization”, why then are the Boy Scouts of America able to spread their propaganda in public schools?

They should be barred from doing so.

Complying with a federal mandate in the No Child Left Behind Act, the Minneapolis school district once again is allowing Boy Scout recruiting materials to be sent home with students.

The mandate obliges schools to give Boy Scouts the same access to schools as other community groups or lose federal aid. It overturns the Minneapolis school district’s ban prohibiting scouts from distributing recruitment materials in schools.

The ban, enacted in 2000, was brought about by opposition to the Boy Scout’s decision to prohibit openly gay men from being scout leaders.

This fall, Minneapolis scouting leaders reported a jump in new scout registrations. The Metro Lakes District, which includes Minneapolis, Richfield and St. Anthony, reported a 108 percent increase.

Access to boys through schools has helped. [...]

Lauri Appelbaum, coordinator of the district’s program for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender students and adults, said she learned of the change from inquiring principals.

“I think it’s really unfortunate that the federal government felt a need to take away local control from school boards,” Appelbaum said. (source)

Here’s a thought....
We go to war with Iraq because they...

have “weapons of mass destruction”
rule their people with an iron hand in their Islamic State
have “nucular” weapons, and we “cannot wait for the final proof -- the smoking gun -- that could come in the form of a mushroom cloud” (President looked us right in the eye and HE LIED Bush)
possess and produces chemical and biological weapons
has given shelter and support to terrorism, and practices terror against its own people

And after we beat the hell out of their country, trying to liberate their country of Islamic tyranny, we show them our form of tyranny in the form of a compassionate prison called Abu Ghraib.

And, after we’ve lost over 2,000 of our guys in war, Iraq votes on it’s Constitution to allow.... an Islamic regime! YAY!!

So, after all is said and done, we are right back to where we were! Except, we’ve lost so many.

Also, we aren’t exactly back where we started. Some choice individuals are a hell of a lot richer than they were. I suppose that war is profitable in some regard.

Second Thought
I love Samuel Barber

Third Thought
That scene in Ice Castles with Robbie Benson in the “underwear scene” was HOT!

Fourth Thought
Go to Google and type in the search word “failure”. When it returns the results, click on the FIRST LINK LISTED.

Fifth Thought
Some places/people suck
Missouri Gay Adoption Ban Challenged. It’s Missouri. Screw ’em.
Elections in Poland, completed with the presidential run-off on October 23, have resulted in a new homophobic government committed to using state power to prevent gays from “infecting” others with homosexuality, as the country’s new prime minister puts it. Hell, sounds like the United States to me.
(Topeka, Kansas) Matthew Limon’s bid for freedom was denied Thursday despite a ruling by the Kansas Supreme Court. It’s Kansas. Screw ’em.

Progress
Washington Supreme Court rules non-biological gay parents can seek rights

Sixth Thought
25 year-old single malt Scotch Whiskey doesn’t suck!

Seventh Thought
I’m not going to watch any more movies where AIDS is the theme. I’ve paid my dues after burying 42 of my friends from AIDS. Now it’s other people’s problem - you know, the ones who didn’t give a damn about us in the early 1980’s when we so desperately needed the help. Well, now that we are seeing movies featuring their kids with the disease, we are now suppose to care? Geez, I sound bitter. I lived the plot of AIDS in real life. I don’t need to relive it on the big screen.

Final Thought
Since only 15% of Americans said they believe in evolution in a recent poll, America must change it’s name to the United States of Jesus Christ.

Human Rights Campaign President Joe Solmonese made the following statement today as the Boston Globe reported that as a senior at Princeton University, Samuel Alito chaired a task force that recommended decriminalizing sodomy and saying discrimination against gays in hiring “should be forbidden.”

“This is a hopeful sign that may provide insight into his philosophy,” said Human Rights Campaign President Joe Solmonese. “There were very few people standing up for gay Americans 34 years ago and most who did have evolved even more since.”

Solmonese continued, “We will continue to learn more between now and the hearings. It’s crucial that we find out more about his views on the right to privacy and other constitutional issues.” (source)

Who knows? Perhaps Alito has a sense of decency in matters that govern real-world decisions that face most Americans. People can change over time, and that change can go either way. If he had these feelings back in college, he could be a much more conservative person now in terms of his views on women’s rights, and the rights of other minorities.

This could be a hopeful sign of the real Samuel Alito and that he is more progressive on social issues than the far right would want him to be, or, he used to be more progressive and, over time, has become far more conservative.

If gay marriage were before him today, I’m 99.9% sure he would find a way to vote against equality for gay partnerships. But in twenty years, who knows? That is when we will see the real Samuel Alito.

Additional Sources
Alito’s College Writing Backed ‘Gay Rights’

Well, I‘m back on line. My site has been growing and growing by the month. I decided to let it lapse for the time being. I think a lot of what is coming to the site is search engines that are simply eating up band width. It seems that being popular on the web has many down sides. One of them is the expense of maintaining and keeping the site on line. I just didn‘t want to keep pumping bandwidth at the problem. So, I made a decision to pull it off line for awhile.

Kent‘s parents came to see us for a few days. We had a good time. I looked forward to their visit. I always do now. If you would have told me fifteen years ago that I would say thing, I would have told you that you were crazy. Time changes people. They have changed, as have I.

One notable event that happened is the fact that they asked us if we were going to get a civil union. I told them no. They didn‘t ask why. The topic came up from a conversation I initiated with them. Kent‘s Dad is the executor of our estate. It tells a lot about how far we have all come in that he is also the executor of my estate, should Kent not be around. That is trust. I asked him if he needed to see our wills and the like, being that he had this responsibility. He saw no need for that, other than to have the name and address of our attorney, should something happen.

Then, his Mom asked if we could just get a civil union. I said that we wouldn‘t. I also mentioned that we will be carrying the documents with us to Yuma, just in case something happens. She was confused by that, because it never occurred to them that we would need them. Unlike them, we do not have the protection of marriage. I hate that we have to prove what we have in this manner, but it‘s all we have. And hopefully, it will be enough. I also hate that I even have to worry about this. I will tell you that it has taken a toll on me. I suppose I should just accept that I live in interesting times, but when you are the group being dissected and singled out for discrimination in state and federal constitutions, it‘s not fun at all. But life goes on. That is one of the reasons I decided to let billandkent.com die, just for a little while. I wanted some distance - some time to think about what I do have, versus what I do not have. I think we all have to do that sometimes.

We‘ve spent the time getting some things around the house done. We now have red oak hardwood floors installed downstairs in the living room and dining room, and they look beautiful. We also had the stairs resurfaced (they are also red oak) and the trim painted white. They look awesome.