Miscellaneous: April 2006 Archives

My uncle was gay and he was a teamster and a truck driver and he was a guy’s guy, but he kept this secret his whole life.

Imagine how hard that must have been for him. I feel so bad. Every time my dad brings it up, he cries because he loves his brother more than anything. He doesn’t care what it was. He was born that way. - Actor Mark Wahlberg (source)

There were a couple of comments left on my site last night. They were both from a young man who said that homosexuality was a “vile sin”. He went on to say that although he felt that it was a “vile sin”, he didn’t favor bashers going around beating people up because that would be like someone going around and beating people up with cancer - both scenarios, in his mind, would be like going out and beating up people who had a sickness, and that just didn’t seem right to him. He finally stated that he didn’t feel that the comment would make it through my comment filters, but it was my site, and he “didn’t expect me to play fair”.

I responded that the comment did indeed make it to my site and that I was going to let it remain. I also added that “judgment” was also a sin and that, according to Christians, all sins are equal in the eyes of God. I then wished him well and that he would find his way.

The next comment he left was on another entry. In that comment he stated that he couldn’t believe that some states were starting to sanction such a “sick and vile arrangement as gay marriage.” That one, my filters caught and held for my approval before posting.

That’s when I decided that he is right, this is my site. AND, I DON’T HAVE AN OBLIGATION TO BE FAIR. I was offended by that last post. You only get to call me “sick” and “perverted” once. After that, I will take your voice away.

I deleted BOTH posts, I banned his IP address from even viewing this site. I further banned his IP and email address from being able to post comments.

You know, in the outside world, I have to worry about this crap. Being an “out” gay man, when I leave my home in the morning, I’m always wondering if I’m going to be unfortunate enough to come across a gay basher. I know that I will most likely come home in one piece. I also know there is a chance that I will end up in a hospital, or dead. That is my reality.

I say this because people who don’t even know me make the assumption that I am gay. Even this morning at breakfast as we sat down at our table, people at another table turned around to look at us. I could tell what they were thinking by the look on their faces. I said nothing, but I registered the disapproval of the grown-ups, and the approval of their teenage daughter. Judgments were made but not spoken in words, and we continued with our breakfast. But at the wrong place, at the wrong time, around the wrong people, who knows?

On this site, I don’t have to worry about judgment and I don’t have to “be fair”. So the next time this young man tries to view this site he will be told that the site has “refused his connection”. Rude, I know - but no worse than calling someone sick and perverted.

And I’m really trying not to say, “I’m fed up with religion - take your crap somewhere else....”, because that would make me just like them; intolerant.

After breakfast, we left for the mall. We are leaving for Paris Wednesday afternoon. I thought it would be easier to carry my camera equipment around with a back pack versus the camera bag I carry on my shoulder. This is a special back pack just made for cameras. We found just the right one and I took the opportunity to buy one more one gigabyte memory card.

We then went to a department store. Kent wanted to get a new pair of dress shoes. While he was looking, I went into the men’s clothing section to look at jackets and the like. I came across some dress blazers by Ralph Lauren priced at $300 each. The sign above them said that they were marked down to $159. However, upon closer inspection, on the sleeve, with a red sticker, it said $19.95!!

So, we bought two $300 blazers for $19.95 each. On top of that, they knocked off another 10% for using my department store charge card! Not a bad deal at all.

Interesting.

Yarbar said she knows at least four homosexual couples who have been together for more than 15 years who first met at an “ex-gay” seminar.

“They went there thinking they had sinful desires ... and yet they met their life partner there,” she said.

Yarbar said when she felt called to ministry, she studied Hebrew and Greek to read the text of the Bible in its original languages and social context. She said it is difficult for modern readers to understand that one word in Hebrew can have 75 different meanings in English.

For example, she said a verse in Leviticus, interpreted by some scholars to condemn homosexuality, is believed by others to be a prohibition against Jews taking part in a ceremony worshipping the fertility god Ba’al, which involved male concubines.

“If we write a letter about (the war in) Iraq and bury it in the sand for a thousand years, then Chinese-speaking Canadians dig it up and translate it with no knowledge of U.S. history... They’re not going to understand it,” Yarbar said. (source)

JAKE GYLLENHAAL admits he’s terrified of his upcoming onscreen gay kiss with HEATH LEDGER, because he has no idea how to fake homosexual intimacy.

The hunky star is teaming up with Ledger in BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN but is struggling to cope with the demands of the storyline - and even his girlfriend KIRSTEN DUNST has failed to lift his spirits as the steamy scenes approach.

He says, “Kirsten looked at the script and said, ‘Well, you aren’t gay and neither is Heath, so there’s a lot of acting required.’

“I just can’t come to terms with it. I know what we have to do and it’s very intimate. I’m blanking it out until we have to do the filming. I’ve spoken to Heath and he sounds terrified.” (source)

You know, it isn’t often that I actually buy a DVD movie anymore. I used to buy them more, but with the cable, Replay TV, Video On Demand, and a video recorder, there’s really no need for me to buy a movie any longer. However, on occasion, I will make an exception. One such exception was that of Brokeback Mountain. I understood the feelings in the movie precisely because much of it has been my life.

In the love scenes, I sensed how awkward the two actors were. I have little patience for it. This is basically my opinion. If two straight male actors cannot perform a convincing gay love scene to me, they have no business being actors. They are third rate. This happened in Brokeback Mountain. I could sense they were having a problem with it. It showed. And I don’t really understand that because if I were called upon to show love to a woman, I could passionately make love to her, even though my heart (or anything else) would not be into it. And I’m not even an actor. I honestly don’t see the big deal.

And I’m not alone. Openly gay actor Sir Ian McKellen feels the same say.

The openly homosexual ‘Lord Of The Rings’ actor slammed 25-year-old Gyllenhaal for failing to consider how his comments would offend the homosexual community.

He said: “I got very upset when one of the actors said it was the most terrifying job he’d ever had because it involved him kissing another man.

“Imagine how rude that is. Suppose I’d said the most appalling thing I ever to do was kiss Helen Mirren!”

Very true. It is offensive and I’m a bit surprised at Jake Gyllenhaal. I have read that he stated that his parents have many gay friends and he was raised in such an environment and said that he feels totally at home around gay people. Apparently, he draws the homophobic line when it comes to making love.

How does this effect me at this point in time? Well, the DVD of Brokeback Mountain are about to come out. I was going to buy the DVD and show my support for a creation that shows our lives. But I’ve changed my mind. I’m disappointed in actors (Jake stated that Heath was equally “terrified” of the love scenes they were going to make together). If he had said that to me, I would have said, “OH PLEASE! If you want to be an artist, there are times that you have to step out of the small shell you know as ‘yourself’, and BE your new self - the character you are playing.”

I would have thought that Jake and Heath would have learned that in elementary acting school. Because that is elementary. The same can be said for any artist who excels in their art. Do you really think that Maria Callas was acting when she performed Tosca? No. She simply was Floria Tosca.

I still remember Theresa Stratas saying, “I sometimes look into a mirror and ask, ‘Who am I?’ That’s a little scary when I feel that I am losing myself to the character I am becoming.” That is art. That is the risk you run at being there and giving everything you have to that moment that the cameras are on you in that love scene. If you become the love scene, there is nothing to hide from. There wouldn’t even be awkwardness (read, homophobia), Jake, because your character of Jack Twist would have been gay, and so would you - if you were really in character.

What has happened to art? Is it going extinct?

At any rate, I no longer have enough respect for the actors to buy Brokeback Mountain. I’ll see it again when it comes out on cable. As McKellen stated, the comments are offensive. I see no need to further support them.